Marriage Counselling

A rocky marriage filled with dramatic emotional ups and downs, or one that is slowly and silently draining the vitality from your life and that of your relationship, or some combination of the two, is cause for some of the most serious stress imaginable.

Marriage problems that end in divorce are associated with the highest level of stress a person can ever experience, just behind that of the death of a spouse. The fact is that couples marrying today have a 50% chance of getting divorced. The demise of a marriage can do lasting damage to spouses, children, family, health, and finances. And trading one’s spouse in on a “newer model” is often not much help either since research suggests that second marriages have a higher rate of divorce than first marriages.
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Seemingly intractable problems like poor communication, infidelity, financial conflicts, substance abuse, anger issues, differences in child rearing styles, sexual difficulties all can lead to the loosening of the marital bond.

Marriage Counselling Solution? If you have even a partially willing spouse, try to work it out. The fact remains, we are attracted to each other based on conscious, but more importantly unconscious wishes, desires and expectations. This is why we tend to repeat the bad marriage or relationship cycle even though we initially believe the new prospect is “different”. The internal models that dictate unhealthy relationships (and healthy ones), once identified by an experienced therapist, can be changed. So too can dysfunctional conscious behavior and communication styles. Even though it is most ideal when both couples are committed to making changes in the marriage, significant change can be made individually as well.

One goal of effective marital counseling is to bring life to the embers of love that were once was a roaring fire. This achieved by the hands of an experienced therapist who can help with the pitfalls of marital symptoms by interpreting their underlying meaning and purpose while offering more appropriate coping and communication styles thus setting the stage for an infinitely happier and more regulated relationship.

I am trained and practice EFT (Emotional Freedom Therapy) developed by the renowned Sue Johnson. It has been scientifically proven to be the most effective and successful therapy for an astonishing 75% of couples in distress. Nothing else remotely comes close.

Looking forward to working with you.

Divorce Mediation

I have done many divorce mediations where both parties were amicable enough to discuss all of the issues at hand. Often, however, one partner is so angry and/or vengeful that mediation is not thought possible. As a result, tens of thousands of dollars and years of wasted negative energy are spent in courtrooms and with lawyers.
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If you are amicable, I can do your divorce from A thru Z for a nominal sum of money. I have also developed a method of doing mediation where the splitting parties are not particularly amicable, but are united in the belief that as much of their money should stay in their hands as opposed to those of their lawyers. The increased cost is minimal. Please phone for further information.

I am especially sensitive to the needs of children throughout any separation, and recommend various family sessions to help all family members through the transition.

Individual, Family and Adolescent Counselling

Assistance with all problems that need individual attention using the appropriate modalities for successful resolution of the problem at hand.
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Addictions & Substance Abuse

All addictions have one common denominator: loss of control. While Alcoholics Anonymous and other 12-step recovery programs can be effective in dealing with substance abuse, they just don't work for everybody. Many abusers either stop on their own, or with the help of an addictions counseller. However, persons suffering from problems of addiction were 'often' children of abusers, or have deep-seated historical issues that need to be addressed via therapy.
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I have adopted an integrative approach that makes use of 12-step programs as well as individual counselling. Over the course of my career, I have helped motivated individuals give up everything from gambling, to cocaine, to sexual addictions. This is a big part of my practice and I am pleased with the success rate achieved by my clients.

Sexual Issues

Many clients have difficulty talking about sexual problems, but it's much more common that you might think. The lament of "he/she is just not interested anymore," rings loud and clear throughout therapists' offices on a daily basis.
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Low libido, no libido, high libido, Internet porn fan--the issues of sex, ever present in the media and selling us everything from soap to Viagra, often keep us lost in the mystery of sexual vitality. Yet at the heart of almost every good relationship I have ever seen, is a good sex life, and that means many things to many people. It is one of the most loving and intimate things to cherish in a relationship, and I will do my utmost to help get you back on track.

Anger Management

Easily the largest part of my practice next to marriage counselling is anger management. I do anger management counselling for individuals seeking help on their own. I also see those who have been in trouble with the police and are seeking counselling through the advice of their lawyers. I will explain to you the way we all get physiologically angry, and offer a multitude of techniques and suggestions for controlling your anger.
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If you have been charged by the police for domestic or simple assault, I run an 8-session individual program and write letters to your lawyer, as you proceed through the system and process, right up until your final day in court.

If it has been a domestic situation and both individuals wish the relationship to continue, I will see the other partner individually, until you can come together. I believe that counselling for both partners is the most important part of this predicament. Your lawyer can often obtain a variance allowing you each come on your own to my office and meet there as a couple. At the end of our session, I will escort you both to your cars.

Stress Reduction Techniques

Stress Management is easily the fastest growing part of my practice. Many of us are so stressed out these days that we are too stressed to even think about it! Yet stress-related problems have become the most common reasons people seek the services of a mental health care professional. It has also been predicted that stress-related physical problems will soon replace heart disease as the number one cause of death.
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Stress is related to either a surplus or deficiency of cortisol, and/or adrenal burnout. Interestingly enough, there is not a prescription drug or medication in the world that works for the reduction of extreme stress. I take a holistic approach to health, and consider all aspects of your life before making an assessment. I use the following techniques to relieve stress and anxiety without medication:
  • Relaxation exercises
  • Breath work
  • Mental imagery
  • Trance work
I will teach you a number of ways to deal with the stressors in your life, and with a little effort, you will find some that work for you and start working with them on a daily basis. Compassion, attitudinal healing, acceptance of oneself and others, letting go, and love and forgiveness are necessary components for relieving anger, which is often an underlying cause of stress.

Mindfulness Meditation & Therapy

Both a technique for relaxation and many kinds of change. Mindfulness has proven to be one of the most important techniques in assisting people with all kinds of issues and problems. It is also one of the best techniques for our overall health and well-being.
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More details about this service here.

Human Growth & Development

Psychologists call it the "family life cycle," but whatever you wish to call it, we are all at some point or another faced with decisions, critical situations, and life-altering events that sometimes even our best friends, parents or spouses, favorite uncles or local bartenders cannot help us with.
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Sometimes an objective ear is needed for just helping to work through a difficult situation. This adventure we call life is filled with twists and turns and sometimes we get lost. New directions are called for, and even the simplest suggestion from a third party may be all that is needed.

Chronic Pain

Many people have suffered automobile or work-related injuries that have resulted in chronic pain. For those who have not endured agonizing pain day in and day out with no relief in sight, this condition is unfathomable. Treatment needs to take into consideration that those around you may not understand your true state of mind and being.
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I work closely with the leading pain specialist in Canada, who will find the best protocol for managing your pain with proper medication. For those of you suffering emotionally as well, I will teach you special pain management techniques that you can utilize throughout the day, especially during moments of 'break-through pain.'
If you don't change directions, you'll wind up where you're heading.